Squeeeealllll

At nearly one, Liam has become a squealer. He squeals when he is playing, squeals when he wants attention, and squeals when he is angry.

The other day, he was mad because he couldn't have something he wanted. He balled his hands into fists, closed his eyes tight and let out a long, sharp shriek. Then he stopped, made sure we were looking at him, then went through the whole process again. After doing this a few times, seeing as how we didn't give him what he wanted, he got busy with something else.

Can't wait until he learns more words!

Breast (milk) Enhancement

Recently I have been reading a lot of information on coconut milk, particularly the lauric acid found in coconut milk. Lauric acid is also present in breast milk and some say it is part of the mix that spurs brain development and health.
I have read in some places that when mom takes lauric acid (and omega-3's-eat your salmon) it quickly gets into the breast milk.
So why not add a spoon of coconut milk to your coffee today?

FYI, to those calorie counters coconut milk DOES have high fat and calories, so if you count, don't forget to add them in.
And those who think I should cut back on coffee while breastfeeding...you might be right, but I love it too much. And my kids seem okay......
most of the time.

Has the Green-Eyed Monster Been Tamed?

It's late, and I am sniffling. I was reading over Roscommon Acres, and the days and weeks following the loss of the author's son. What talent and grace she possesses.
Today was another day. A bit frustrating. Sometimes I feel like I am spinning my wheels at work and accomplishing nothing. Sometimes I don't even know what is expected of me. I can't go into detail due to privacy issues, but I can so, special education can be so frustrating.
As I was walking out, a coworker told me she put in her resignation to stay home after this year. I made a crack about being jealous, but honestly,  I am not. I am DELIGHTED for her. I don't think she will ever regret this decision to enjoy her little ones' early years.
But since I am such a jealous little creature, I wondered why don't I feel jealous now?
Am I finally reaching maturity?
Maybe I know that I have made the decision to work myself, regardless of what I say I can and can't do. I COULD get food stamps. I COULD take the 13 or 14 thousand in retirement out. Sure I would have to start over when I got rehired. If I COULD get rehired in my advanced age:o). But....I don't know if that is the right choice.
But feeling like I have a choice, erases the jealousy. And it feels very, very nice to be me.

Cloth vs. Disposable diapers. Why I am a better mom.

With my first two children I used cloth diapers, pretty exclusively, until they trained right around two years.. Taryn used cloth until she was nearly two and I moved into a an apartment. Then she used paper for about six months until she pottytrained. I liked cloth. I liked feeling socially responsible and using what mothers have used through the ages. My exhusband was pretty much on board for any idea I had.
Karl doesn't like cloth. And seeing them through his eyes, I understand. They are more work. They aren't as absorbent. All those cute fancy designs-they are for me. I work. I have a little extra cash (well, not really, but I live like I do).So a bag of diapers every now and then-not a big deal.
Karl's mom keeps buying disposable diapers. And I find myself using them more and more. And as much as I like the alterna way of doing things (landfills aside), I think disposables are better. How lame am I?

I am not, actually. I am doing what is best for Liam's sore little umm, you know. And as hard as is it is to turn my back on the "better" choice, it is better than driving Karl crazy with cloth and Liam getting a sore penis because I can't afford a wardrobe of wool covers to air the diapers out. Make the best choice for my family: that makes me the better mom.
So nyah!

I love this food "pacifier"

I really love this fresh food feeder! Liam tends to gag on small pieces of food if they aren't very very soft. But I can fill this with apple or plum pieces and he can suck and chew away. He really really likes it filled with pineapple. Yum!

Little Liam- a love note

Liam is sleeping on my bed. I suppose I should go move him to his own soon. I love peaceful Friday evenings, when the whole of the weekends still stretches before me, and the house is mine. Of course, every light in the house is on. I should do something about that.
So here is a love note to my son:

Dear Liam,
I love the way you cry when I go to work. Although I don't want you to be unhappy, it makes me feel good that my leaving affects you. I love the slow, big smile that lights up your face when I come home. I love how you say everything we eat or drink now is "hot!" regardless of what it is. I love how you open and close your chubby sweet hands and say "Star" as you look at the stars on your mobiles. Or the light. Or the windchime. Or the ceiling fan.
I love to watch you push your push toy, and listen as you "vroom" while you push the toy car. When you chase your big green ball around the house, knees and hands barely pounding the floor, in your pursuit.
I love snuggling down to nurse you at night, and the way you sit up and wait for me at three in the morning.
I love the joy of watching you unfold, piece by piece. It is hard to imagine that one day you will be big like Caleb. Too big for kisses, embarrassed to be cared for, yet still needing so much. One day you will take the precious grin, sweet and trusting as your daddy's, and head off for a job. One day you will cry with disappointment over a broken heart, and fret with the discontent of middle age. Like all mothers, I only wish your strength will persevere, and you will keep that darling heart which has captivated me.

As you come closer to your first year on Earth, I wonder how long ago your life was planned. Are we part of the ages or just fleeting thoughts? Did you walk with us before you were your own person here, or are a you a brand new creation?
Regardless of the answer, I thank God for your existence. How stunningly phenomenal is the simple life of a mother, and the all-encompassing joy and love of watching others grow.

Love,
Mommy